


3 Times Judas Looked at Jesus and didn't understand [+1 time Peter got T.M.I.]

by Hikary



Category: Christian Bible (New Testament), Jesus Christ Superstar - All Media Types
Genre: 3 times +1, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Blushing, Cuddling & Snuggling, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Jesus is a little shit, Judas and Simon are bffs, M/M, Stargazing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 03:07:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20382664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hikary/pseuds/Hikary
Summary: Judas definitely doesn't like the new kid, Simon got this wrong, and Peter has nothing to worry about.But, most importantly, there's no way the new kidlikes him.Right?





	3 Times Judas Looked at Jesus and didn't understand [+1 time Peter got T.M.I.]

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gondolin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gondolin/gifts).

> This is a bunch of bullshit I wrote on my lunch break, because Gondolin is an idiot and The Bible is Brokeback Mountain. Do. Not. Ask.
> 
> MY BEAUTIFUL BABIES JUST HAD THEIR FINAL SHOW AT THE BARBICAN <3 'I've been living to see you' quite literally, this run has been too short and I will cry myself to sleep tonight ;___; Please come back soon!
> 
> For the sake of mental images, my Jesus is traditionally a Middle Eastern version of a twenty-something hipster from Hackney, and Judas is whatever the heck pleases you as long as he's Afro-American. But I know everyone has their own cast (ironically, none of my Judas/Jesus fit the description!), so if your Jesus is South-Korean and your Judas from Calusco d'Adda, bring it on! 
> 
> Also, feel free to imagine Hugh Skinner as Peter. 
> 
> (I've just realised I now want a k-pop version of JSC, in genderswap, with Jesus!Lisa, Judas!Jennie, Mary Magdalene!Rose and Simon!Jisoo) (and this, my children, is why you shouldn't work on a night shift for more than 12 months, amen)

** [1] **

\- Dad is a _dick_. - Judas says, and he catches a glimpse of Peter's horrified expression.

\- Not the kind you like, though. - Simon giggles, because he's an idiot and therefore his best friend, or the other way around, and some of the other kids follow.

Judas offers Simon his best not-fake-but-neither-actually-sincere smile and tries his best to look casual while he steals a glance of the new boy. Because, let's be honest here, all he cares about these days is _him_ , so smart and quiet and infuriating and occasionally sassy as hell, that Judas cannot figure out, no matter how much he stares. And boy, _does he stare_. He is past the point of caring, and the weirdest thing is, Jesus doesn't seem to mind. He often stares back, wearing an unreadable expression, his lips always tied by a seriousness that would look out of place on any other 15-year-old boy but him. 

It doesn't come as a surprise, then, that Jesus doesn't look amused right now. 

\- What? - Judas pushes him.

\- Nothing. That's not the word I would have used, that's all. -

\- Of course it isn't. You're too damn polite for that. -

\- I would have said... - he pauses for effect, and Judas is damn sure he _smiles_ for a fraction of a second - _Father_ is a dick. -

Judas blinks. He can hear Simon laughing maniacally behind him.

\- _Fuck you_. - he murmurs, but in that specific way teenagers throw insults when they're fond of each other.

Jesus is blushing a little, and just on the sides of his neck, where only a degenerate stalker like Judas could notice. He leans forward, eyes filled with determination, looking every bit as if he is going to answer Judas, but he doesn't. 

Judas doesn't understand. He doesn't understand one bit.

** [2] **

So much for the "new kid", Jesus is a fucking middle-class housewife: he knows everything about everyone, and the whole neighbourhood learns pretty fast to walk the opposite direction when they see him around. Jesus has this power to persuade people, no matter what, and Judas thanks the universe because he only uses said power for a noble cause, or else he will be ruling the world soon. The gang is impressed, and they start to follow him around like a loyal pack of wolves, apart from Judas. According to Simon, "_he looks more like a lovesick puppy"_. Even Maddy, their resident cynic, has been dragged into the plan. 

Jesus, he observes, has a soft spot for intricate plans: let's say you're going from A to B, well, he would find a way to do that blindfolded and with his hands tied, for the sake of drama. He also notices how Jesus finds a perverse satisfaction in making people do not simply _anything_ , to help him and his causes, but precisely the one thing they would never ever do in a normal situation. Needing a donation to implement plant-based options at the school cafeteria? Ask the butcher. Are they planning to raise money for the annual music festival and they need someone in charge of the cake sale? Recruit the old lady across the street, the one who spends her Friday evenings filing complaints to the Council about the noise. Some of their friends believe Jesus likes a challenge, others think it has some sort of educational purpose, but Judas knows the truth: _Jesus is a little shit_ . He has a wicked sense of humour, to the point where most of the time people think _he doesn't have a sense of humour_, and they end up being the only two idiots laughing. But there is no malice in Jesus, he is sure of that.

\- But _why _the butcher? - Judas insists, his belly still hurting from laughter. 

\- It's about balance, you know. People have different life experiences, but that shouldn't be a barrier. They should help each other. -

\- Bullshit. You just wanna see Mr Todd at the launch party for the new vegan menu. -

\- _And that_. - Jesus giggles - He might start appreciating the joys of tofu. -

\- Fair, fair. You were right, fried tofu is a fucking drug and now you got me addicted. -

They are sitting next to each other on the side of the street, almost curled up on the floor - their usual spot, they both dislike benches, for some reason. 

\- I was impressed. I didn't think you would have tried it without making a scene. -

\- Well - Judas shrugs - You cooked for me. I would probably swallow a rock if you asked me. I would probably swallow _anything_. -

It looks like someone has just set fire to Jesus' neck, _again._

Judas is still completely obvious and wonders where these random reactions come from.

** [3] **

\- You're an idiot! -

\- Do _not_ raise your voice with me. -

\- Oh, I am sorry. - Judas lowers his voice - _You're a fucking idiot._ -

\- It wasn't that bad. - but the standard of his excuses is way below the average, even Jesus can see Judas needs to be calmed down before he has a stroke. - But I am _genuinely _sorry I made you worry. -

Wrong answer.

\- Of course, because if I weren't here to babysit you, you would get killed any minute, because _what am I,_ the overprotective mum-friend, _poor Judas, let's not make him worry, _ what about _heck J, that looks like a great idea for a suicide, just checking if the plan was still surviving the day or..._ -

\- Judas, please, breathe. -

\- Said the one I almost had to perform CPR on. - 

\- Guys, seriously, do you want a room? - Simon’s voice sounds amused, but Judas is having a very hard time finding anything funny about _this_.

\- _Yes_. - he replies, hastily, because that’s the first good idea he has heard today.

Everyone turns to Judas - including Peter, with his expression of perpetual concern, and Maddy, usually too unimpressed to bother. Judas' mouth is obviously not catching up with the situation. 

\- This idiot needs to lay down. C'mon, we can go to my place. - 

And then, something amazing happens: Jesus stands up, obediently, and follows Judas without a word. 

When he turns to check Jesus is still there (he hasn't said a word the whole way home), he finds the other boy with his eyes firmly planted to the ground, and the now-familiar blush. 

On the dictionary, under the definition of "clueless", they should add Judas' picture. 

** [+1] **

Nothing else matters, though. 

When they are together, Judas is unabashedly happy. He could swear Jesus feels the same way, although he doesn't like dwelling too much on the topic. Simon never gets tired of teasing him about his - apparently obvious? - crush for their fearless leader. Judas knows there's not a chance in a billion that his feelings might be reciprocated, and he is so not in the mood to lose the best thing that has ever happened to him. 

They're happy, right?

That's all that matters. 

Apart from those spare moments when Jesus is not happy, of course, that Judas is completely terrified of: sometimes, Jesus is clearly uncomfortable or so tired he can't keep up his image of the perfect leader anymore. Judas cannot help noticing it only happens when they're are alone. Is he doing something to trigger those episodes? 

It all comes down to one night, in the end. They all go camping in the botanic garden for Midsummer, with the intention of stargazing. They end up falling asleep almost immediately after setting camp because the garden is on a freaking hill and the only way to get there is by foot. 

Jesus is the only one awake - or so he thinks. Judas has been drifting to sleep for a while now, lying next to him on the grass. He snuggles closer, and Jesus puts his arm around his shoulder, almost eagerly. Judas' face is buried in the crook of Jesus' neck, and the other boy's curls are a bit ticklish against his face, preventing Judas from falling asleep completely. 

\- I cannot believe it - Jesus' voice is barely a whisper - that of all the people in the world I managed to find you. - he sighs happily - I'm so damn lucky. - 

Judas is fully awake now. Possibly the most awake he has ever been. 

\- I am sorry I always come to you to complain and bitch about stuff. You're the only one who makes me feel that safe. I know you won't judge me if I say something stupid. Or, like, think less of me if I look like crap sometimes. - 

Send. Help. 

\- And I'm sorry I get so awkward when... well, you know when. Sometimes I don't know if you're messing with me or- - 

\- I love you. - Judas says, for good measure, because he might not understand much in general, but now that he's beginning to grasp the meaning of this thing between them, he'd rather do an overkill than miss the target. 

Neither of them moves for a long, terrifying minute. Then, just to add one more point to the list of things Judas will never understand, Jesus starts laughing. Out loud. His whole body is shaking with laughter, and when he turns his head to look directly at Judas, he feels like his insides are suddenly melting. Jesus’ smile is so bright and genuine he wants to cry - because he might call J a drama queen as much as he wants, but no one has an emotional breakdown like Judas. He doesn’t have time, though: Jesus leans closer and kisses him. From that on, it’s a giant blur of kisses and touches and _I love you too, you idiot._

(A few hours later, Peter wakes everyone up with a horrified scream.)

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for the reference. If there's a bar in Heaven, I'm sure Judas and Grantaire are best drinking buddies.
> 
> (It's possible I will go through this again when I get some sleep and correct/edit a few things, but nothing substantial.)


End file.
